Why do you think if I ask a strange question it means I'm mad?

Not to Mention

Just being kids, our kind isn't interesting to hook up with, though that was my goal still.

I mean, really, "what" comes up?

Punishing Me

You all act like I'm a person who starts trouble, a trouble-maker.  When you get mad at me for something that's not that bad, like drunk driving, you won't forgive me.

Pampering Her

So, what -did- you like @ "Ellen?"  Was it that she was interesting?  Ordinary?  I know I did those 2 things and I was NOT supported, so how can I trust the world if I feel like shit no matter what I've done?  It's racism.

This happens with everyone who does this who's not non-Caucasian.  What if I'm the best or 1 of the better 1s?  What if I'm really good as a person?  I don't feel anything special @ who I am.  Don't try to take it back..

Problems

I saw Ellen and my mom parading @ my Gramma moving to Florida and my mom moving away someday to Indonesia.  I'm worried the cursing did it.  That's mean, I Was upset and Ellen wouldn't stop the noises in my room.  She lives whatever life she choses cuz she has money and no one experimenting on her and can see her mom every day who supports her as a person!

Either way, I get mad by the by.  I get threatened and hurt, too.  My Gramma was nice before the N word thing etc.  She started coming down here when I missed a summer to do stuff in the city, summer things or programs.  I did a musical and went to college early..  1 summer I worked but still went on vacation.  She told me to call her more, too, then, but I never remembered to do so and follow through with it.

What if..

You tried to hurt me and I just didn't let it get to me and then you got mad because of it?

New Photo

New Photo of Me

TV

"The Ellen DeGeneres Show"

Today was a really good episode.  I liked the tennis, want to try some myself.  The Russian girl was really nice, too.

I think I saw

Ellen's mom!  How respectable and nice it'd be to know her.  How wonderful!  Too bad I'm not fit to say that.

Someone has a message for or about Ellen-

Ellen is there to ward off and get in the faces of older kids too old to be her kid but who love her generation ..and go straight for it.. .. to tell them, "Nanny nanny boo boo, you aren't the age you wanna be to me and you can't do nor say nothin' and get away with the truth!"

Y

It causes a lot of pain and made me be noisy and get on more mediation!  It's not Ellen's mom's fault!  Why would I think that?  I know I do it like from experience with Ginny in her class.  I wanted to kick my backpack at the movie theater when recollected of her.  But I didn't, I was fine..  I did stuff later, and I felt I would never be forgiven.

Problems

I got really mad and hit the dishes, and my opportunities to branch out beyond my family and to have a good relationship to what I got as my family are taken from me.  My mom is lying and not talkin @ that.  I told her I was upset @ her secret messages, and now I'm on some anger-help pill, too.

I can't believe it, my dad won't give it a rest.  You know, the people here did treat me like I have no tomorrow.  They thought my dad was treating me differently.  The N word thing.  That was with the little kid.

Problem

Now, the world revolves around Ellen's mom being referred to in a confused manner..  :o  And I'm the 1 picking up the shit or junk or suffering of the matter like I did with Nell Burton's likes.  I like both of them a lot, but I'm being tortured like 24/7 by the messages and lies people tell me through sounds they make and how they move.  Oh, and cuz I was the 1 who did it, though with Nell, something was bound to happen if you look at it in another way though maybe not..  I don't know what to say @ the fact I did it cuz I really don't mean anything.

Problem

Ellen is sick and won't stop.  She's probably a hungry beast.  There's usually a way if you didn't mean any harm..  It seems they are going by my goals.  I mean, I feel I'm forever being watched.

Laying Down

Maybe, I'll just lay down.. Sorry, Ellen.

Huh?

Where'd Mom go?

Fish

I thought it was its fault and it cried behind a rock its color.

Problem

ELLEN STOP YOU *BEEP*

You were mean to me via your mom and I was just playing and because of your sorry ass I'm on more medicine.

My mom keeps bugging me.  She makes noises with mean messages!  I'm on more medicine for telling her that after going up and explaining why I did the dishes so noisily.  This keeps going on with lots of people all the time, it seems.

Looking for what?  I didn't do anything.  You're just a mean racist *beep*  My mom is bugging me every minute because of your mom!

How about a taste from the dark side?  Why don't you do something for yourself and your life!

I didn't say anything about what to do about this, but this is what's going on so far.

What's More

My mom might leave forever and I have my AUNT coming every birthday sometime.

I know you don't really care.

Problems

I wanted my relationship with my family to grow, but you *beep* have Tim Burton there saying, "Oh, no, you can't change after that."  Well, yes we do!  We were gonna change, anyway!  Everyone and anyone may have!  I see Ellen DeGeneres carefully crafted my Gramma to come here, maybe cuz I curse on my blog though anyone can curse, and she was mean to me, started! for no reason except maybe I didn't follow her on Twitter over the summer, didn't think she wanted everyone to.  I'm not gonna be m.. over her developing insecurities.  '}:[

Mobile

may or may not post

What I Can't Stand

I am NOT a Chinese AT ALL who dislikes Jew.  I even look more Jewish than a part Jew.

New Photos

New Photos of Me

Foiling

People say that their failings to be cool are them doing a favor to us, but I know for a fact it's something you get and that you are responsible for.  It was totally made up.  They learn to have a good time but forget @ the end.

This is also connected to race.  I'm not sure what it usually is.

New Video of Me Singing

IMDb

Facebook

I just did some Pilates.

Update

I added a section on my website for videos of me singing on Facebook.